A lot of us get stuck because we focus on things that are outside of our control. The more we do this, the more disempowered we are, and the more frustrated or disappointed or angry or anxious we feel. In contrast, the more we focus on what’s in our control, the more empowered we are; we can actually do something useful.
So here are some ideas to help you get clearer about what definitely is not in our control, and what isn’t, in our control, and what potentially is:
Outside My Control
Within My Control (Potentially)
Note the very important word “potentially”, up top on the right hand column; if we’re on auto-pilot, being jerked around by our thoughts and feelings, we’re not likely to be able to exert control in these areas. But if we are mindful – that is self-aware, present, engaged in what we are doing, able to let our thoughts and feelings flow through us without getting hooked by them – then we can exert control in these areas.
Of course, this isn’t an exhaustive list; I’m sure you can think of other things to add on both sides. However, it’s a good start. So if you want to empower yourself, then get mindful and focus on the stuff in the right hand column. Good luck!
25 Jul 2018
The Sushi Train metaphor offers a great tool for unhooking from difficult or unhelpful thoughts.